An Unknown Feeling

I felt like a feather flying somewhere. My legs lost their strength to stand. I wanted to lie on the ground but this mind kept wandering and wondering.

Uncertainty, I guess, is the uncomfortable feeling that keeps bothering me.

Am I overthinking? Yes, every day.

Am I overanalyzing? Yes, every moment.

Am I depressed? Need to be confirmed.

We need a goal to reach, a target you want to aim for. I do have a personal KPI as I made for my work. However, my target seems not unattractive or I am lost motivation to pursue it.

I am asking myself again :

What is my worth?

Do I have value as a human?

Is there any meaning of my existence?

If I am disappeared from this world, is there any significant impact on my surrounding? Or I am just invisible.

I don’t want to dramatize my life. But this thought I can’t get over with it.

I try to console my mind by reading self-help books, but I am still unable to find the answer.

I am asked my good friend and she said you may be tired.

I am sharing my feeling with my spiritual teacher and she said you may not be close enough to your Creator.

Then I wonder? I don’t know how to define my feeling anymore. Is this valid or not?

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